On the first day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
A false prophet named Mr. Swartley.

On the second day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
Two doting Towners,
And a false prophet named Mr. Swartley.

On the third day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
Three Watching Halls,
Two doting Towners,
And a false prophet named Mr. Swartley.

On the fourth day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
Four empty hearings,
Three Watching Halls,
Two doting Towners,
And a false prophet named Mr. Swartley.

On the fifth day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
No PILOT agreements,
Four empty hearings,
Three Watching Halls,
Two doting Towners,
And a false prophet named Mr. Swartley.

On the sixth day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
Jack and Wayne crowing,
No PILOT agreements,
Four empty hearings,
Three Watching Halls,
Two doting Towners,
And a false prophet named Mr. Swartley.

On the seventh day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
SCIDA sidestepping,
Jack and Wayne crowing,
No PILOT agreements,
Four empty hearings,
Three Watching Halls,
Two doting Towners,
And a false prophet named Mr. Swartley.

On the eighth day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
UPC still lying,
SCIDA sidestepping,
Jack and Wayne crowing,
No PILOT agreements,
Four empty hearings,
Three Watching Halls,
Two doting Towners,

And a false prophet named Mr. Swartley.

On the ninth day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
Ninety holes a-digging,

UPC still lying,
SCIDA sidestepping,
Jack and Wayne crowing,

No PILOT agreements,
Four empty hearings,
Three Watching Halls,

Two doting Towners,
And a false prophet named Mr. Swartley.

On the tenth day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
Ten towers arising,
Ninety holes a-digging,
UPC still lying,
SCIDA sidestepping,
Jack and Wayne crowing,
No PILOT agreements,
Four empty hearings,
Three Watching Halls,
Two doting Towners,
And a false prophet named Mr. Swartley.

On the eleventh day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
Taxpayers paying,
Ten towers arising,
Ninety holes a-digging,
UPC still lying,
SCIDA sidestepping,
Jack and Wayne crowing,
No PILOT agreements,
Four empty hearings,
Three Watching Halls,
Two doting Towners,
And a false prophet named Mr. Swartley.

On the twelfth day of Christmas,
Money love sent to me
Twelve lawsuits building,
Taxpayers paying,
Ten towers arising,
Ninety holes a-digging,
UPC still lying,
SCIDA sidestepping,
Jack and Wayne crowing,
No PILOT agreements,
Four empty hearings,
Three Watching Halls,
Two doting Towners,
And a false prophet named Mr. Swartley.